much to the credit of his parents, little Cole continues to be one of the most emotionally adept toddlers i've ever observed or interacted with.

his acceptance of strangers, both adult and child, and his agreeable and curious nature were just sort of mindblowing. as was his appetite.

(after a large dinner he consumed two enormous slices of watermelon--seeds and all--, two pieces of cake, a slice of peach pie, and around a cup of redi-whip which ryan sprayed into a spoon for him over and over...)

there were several 'too cute' moments where i judged my reaction to be that of a grandmother's. sheesh. i was so close to weeping.

the epic struggle inside me: maternal, pastoral team vs. team that wants to travel back to age 20 and revisit that era's excesses.

if every woman experiences that, may i ask, when does it end? it's making me really tired and conflicted.