you'll all be quite pleased to know:

1.) the aformentioned 'pit of hell' boyfriend is history (albeit, possibly, temporarily). i don't think i had anything to do with it.

2.) only one more wedding to go.

3.) fuck squirrels, no amount of cayenne is keeping them from my callas.

4.) the allergist i hope to visit soon has a name out of a tolkein tome-- abner bagenstose.