when i was an elementary school student, i begged my mother for art supplies and office supplies, fabric and plastics and appliances of various sorts-- all in an attempt to satisfy my urge to mimic things (products, images) I admired and wanted to interact with.

the frustrating part of this need I felt, after mom bought some or most of the stuff i'd been pleading for, was that i never knew where to begin. the projects, the ideas that inspired or ignited me, were too large to take hold of, too abstract to duplicate. I didn't know where to begin.

I still don't. I am, as of Monday, the Web editor of a fairly large DC non-profit that seeks extensive and "cutting-edge" renovations to its meager online presence.

Here at the new office, I am surrounded by toys and gadgets and expensive software and generous amounts of crayons and paper and inking devices... my imagination isn't used to such reality. All along I've been fumbling through the Catholic school of life-- never questioning the lack of resources or the scrappily carpeted halls.

Now that I have what I need, how do I use it?

I could say this of my heart as well.