i've been tempted to write everything into list format lately. it's just so much easier, and i'm so much lazier (sp?).

here are a couple of words i always forget to work into my daily lexicon:

bailiwick, and lexicon.

okay, that said, i am deep inside a true redesign (or maybe 're-' isn't appropriate, maybe it's just the first real design ever) of fallingout.

finally, embarrassingly, i have utilised some menial css and ssi to make it easier for me to update, and i'm also going to make use of movabletype. AND my mummy (who, incidentally, has her very own linux box) will be hosting me.

not that any of that will be apparent to yous. but it makes me hum, and ponder the enormous amount of peanut brittle i have yet to make for the holidays. (read: i decided to go all martha stewart and send gourmet packages filled with homemade sweets and crackers and pastas and stuff- you lucky kids!)

it's rather intimidating, the amount of

fudge and peppermint bark occupying my counterspace. i'm sure you can all relate.

though i don't think it is the result of any one charitable donation - i don't feel that anxious about the holidays this year- which is weird. i haven't yet had a mini-breakdown regarding poverty or the state of the union, or how much Bush just fucking sucks the big one, or how my family is so cruelly dysfunctional (though i've had mini-breakdowns on other unrelated topics perchance).

i feel okay. i feel like i'll be able to bear the alcoholic filter my family exists behind during the xmas season, and i'm making my requisite pilgrimage to the other side of the family this coming weekend, so that will no longer be a mental burden for me...

and i'm sure some or most of my calm has to do with ry and his infinite reserve of perspective and patience, which i covet and benefit from. and having an ally for the holidays cannot be underestimated.